What I’m Learning by Jennifer Moye
I never struggled with self-confidence until I became a mom.
One would think that having three kids and two deployments in three years either…
(a) kill me
(b) make me supermom.
Lately I’ve been asking myself the question, why don’t I feel like supermom?
What I’m Learning
“I’ve found the recipe for being happy whether full or hungry, hands full or hands empty. Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.” Philippians 4:12 MSG
The One who makes me who I am.
These words seem to lift off the page as I read.
I’ve always known that I am a child of God. I’ve learned my identity is found in Him and not in what others say I am. But somehow today, the words who I am reach straight to my heart.
Not what I am or who’s I am. But who I am.
In the chaotic mess of motherhood, paired with the transitions and stresses of military life, I lost track of my true identity.
I wanted my husband to fill my confidence tank. I so desperately needed him to tell me I was a good mom and a good wife.
I didn’t just want him to tell me the words, I wanted to feel it.
Questions pounded at my heart:
- Why wasn’t he telling me that enough?
- Why wasn’t I receiving the affirmations my heart craved?
- Am I really doing a bad job? Is he just blind? Does he not care?
And then it hit me.
This doesn’t have anything to do with my husband. My husband will never be able to fill the spot in my heart that God is meant to fill. In fact, the more I try to force my husband to make me feel valued, the more pressure I put on him and on our marriage.
You see, I began to focus on why my husband wasn’t doing this or doing that. But this issue has nothing to do with him. When I begin to expect anyone to gratify my need for love, approval, and affirmation, I’m expecting them to fill a void that only God can fill.
Paul tells us that whether we have everything or have nothing, we can be confident in the One who made us who we are.
How I’m Learning
Learn about my identity in Christ. Reading God’s word teaches me the truth of who I am and how much I am loved. The more I know who I am in Christ, the more I connect with God.
Ask the Holy Spirit to draw attention to a specific word, phrase, or verse. The Holy Spirit is our guide and teacher, helping us to understand. I reflect on specific words that stand out when I read the Bible. This is one way I listen to God.
Choose to believe God’s truth. Knowing the facts, I can read God’s words millions of times and it may not change my life. The power isn’t in the knowing. Change takes place when I take it to heart. My soul is filled when I choose to believe what God says over how I feel.
Think About It
When I begin to find my fill in what God says about me, a funny thing happens. I actually begin to feel full and loved.
God’s word shows that He thinks I am pretty spectacular and you are too. He might even think I am close to supermom whoever she is. His word tells me that I am worth the life of His Son.
Looking through the lens of God, I begin to see my life and my worth in an entirely new way.
- So maybe I am not supermom.
- Maybe I have to run the washer three times with the same clothes in it because I keep forgetting to change them over.
- Maybe I don’t always have it together.
Maybe I even think I am failing . . . but God says otherwise. He says that just as I am, right now, I am worth dying for.
When we come to Christ with our need, He provides what we need to be all in.
And my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:19 NASB
Has your confidence been shaken lately? Frustrated and tired of running on empty?
When we come to Him with our empty hearts, He will provide for our need. Every single time.
Pray About It
Sweet Father, thank You for who You are. Thank You for comfort when I am shaken and strength when I am burdened. When my confidence rattled and doubts creep in, help me rely on You. Fill my heart with your love. You are the One who quenches my thirst for value and worth.
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